Notice: This article was written by Steve Jordan, Coach's Notebook. Email the author at sjordan@alaskalife.net.
As a coach, would you like to really make a significant difference in a player’s life? If you want to teach something that will not only mold a better basketball player but also mold a better human being, then teach communication skills. That’s right … put communication in your practice plan.
Do any of the following situations seem familiar?
You bring your team into the huddle to discuss a crucial learning point and, looking up from your clip board, you notice one player rolling his eyes, another who thinks upturned eyeballs are pretty darn funny, and a couple others who are staring into some other quadrant of the universe. You feel offended and make the kids run as an object lesson.
Practice seems to be going fine when, suddenly, two players begin a loud argument. You break it up. Later, as you try to understand the conflict, you frequently hear the word stupid and the other player’s name used closely together.
The phone rings and hour before game time.
“Uh, hi Coach, this is Adam. I, uh, … um, My mom says I can’t come to the game tonight.”
“That’s too bad. Why can’t you come to the game?”
“Well, she told me I had to clean my room and, like, we got into an argument.”
Communication is the exchange of thoughts, feelings and information. The examples above are result of poor communication transfer skills. The thoughts, ideas and information are valid in each case, but the delivery and reception process was ineffective leading to frustration for all parties.
Coaches can teach effective communication just like they teach basketball plays. It’s not fair to criticize players for not listening if they simply don’t know how. Why would you berate your players for not boxing out if you have never shown them how? Don’t assume they can communicate on an adult level because they cannot. They’re kids, not adults.
Delivery – Getting the message out.
Why is delivery so important? Requests for clarification are annoying to both the speaker and the listener. Frustrated listeners will think the speaker is “stupid”. Frustrated speakers asked answering the question, “What?” for the umpteenth time will consider the listener “stupid”. In competition, vague communication is inefficient and may mean defeat. There is no time for “What?” As the coach, avoid asking, “What?” There are more constructive ways to get the information.
Ways to Improve Player Delivery
Instead of interpreting your player’s ill-defined references, slang or incomplete sentences (and we enable poor communication by becoming adept at translation), take your players literally – absolutely literally. The results will be so ridiculous the players will see both the humor and the reason for clear speech.
Here’s an example. When I have a chance to drive players home after a practice, I ask them for directions to their house. Students are horrible at giving directions. They assume too much. I take every instruction literally (unless it creates an unsafe situation!). The player may say, “Take the next turn”, and I’ll turn up right, up the next driveway rather than the next street. The player corrects himself with a laugh and says, “No, I meant turn left on the next street, 34th avenue, where the blue house is!” Once a player mumbled, “See the immediate right?” I looked out the window and answered, “I don’t see a meteorite!”
Another example An excellent way to promote clear delivery is to ask the players to explain drills and skills. After a few times the kids will lose their self-consciousness. You will also notice that once they understand their techniques more fully, they will explain them with pride.
Yet another example Try blindfolds. For instance, do the shell drill, but blindfold 2 or 3 defensive players. The other defenders must not only uphold their own responsibilities, but also talk their teammates through the defensive position changes.
Ways to Improve Player Receptivity (Listening)
Communication is definitely a two-way street. The listener has two important jobs. One, she must pay attention and collect the information. Two, she needs to acknowledge receipt. Acknowledgement not only confirms the message was received, it is also a sign of respect. People who do acknowledge the speaker are considered very rude.
How does a listener appropriately respond? Usually eye contact and a nod are sufficient. As a coach, you must insist on at least this level of confirmation. If the information is complex or the feeling is intense, a good listener responds by concisely restating the message or by asking for further clarification.
Here’s an example. Line your players up on the baseline. Point to the other end of the court and say, “When I blow the whistle, I want each of you to run full speed to the other end of the court and back, and touch the baseline three times!” Blow the whistle quickly. The poor listeners will run three laps and complain that some players (the good listeners) only did one lap. The good listeners followed the directions – down and back, and they tapped the baseline three times.
Another example The players form three lines under the basket. The line in the middle has a basketball. Facing them are three defensive players lined up at the free throw line extended. Give each defensive player a number, 1, 2 or 3. When you call out a number, that player must run to the baseline he/she is facing (15’) then turn and sprint back to help his teammates who are under a three on two fast break. To force them to listen then react, call out different numbers, too. Say 7 or 9 or a nonsense world like butterscotch. Believe it or not, some kids will spring into action upon hearing a word like butterscotch and then hear it from their teammates.
Yet another example Insist upon proper acknowledgements when you address the team. Tell players you want their eyes front and nods. If you notice someone not paying attention, stop talking and look at him/her very intently. Soon all eyes on the team will be on him/her, too. When the player realizes what happened, he or she will be back on track. This is a way to command attention without making an issue of it. Your expression can be as stern as you want. An alternative is to ask the offending player what you just said. Sometimes the player will repeat exactly what you just said which means he/she was listening, but listening rudely. The players need to understand the role of body language.
The role of body language
Body language must certainly predate spoken language. For instance facial expressions and body posture can be either threatening or compassionate. They can also provide an entirely different message than the one being spoken. Which message is believed? People trust the body language every time. It shows what we feel. Even toddler-aged kids know how to say yes and really mean no. That’s why is it is important for players to use proper visual cues – eye contact, nods, hustling to the huddle. One way to sell it is to tell them that everyone in the stands sees their body language. Fans, parents and the player’s prospective coach will all judge the player’s attitude on body language.
How to Communicate with Coaches
Players, be respectful. Look your coach in the eye when he or she is talking. Don’t interrupt. Nod if you understand. Ask a question if you need more information. Offer ideas if you think they will help the team. If the coach wants to go in a different direction than you do, support the coach. Its not the player’s job to run the team. If you think it is, your team will suffer.
If you are having personal problems that may affect your play or your ability to participate, tell your coach as soon as possible. Coaches cannot help you if you keep them in the dark.
How to Communicate with Teammates
In sports, it is often necessary to be blunt and direct. Remember that you and your teammates have a common goal – to make the team succeed. It’s OK to speak up with an unpopular opinion if you think it is in the team’s best interest. Kids are reluctant to speak assertively to peers and are overly concerned about appearing bossy or exposing themselves to ridicule. That may be OK socially, but if you want to be competitive, you need to take risks, and that means speaking up and telling other people what to do when the situation requires leadership.
Be considerate of teammates’ feelings. Presumably, everyone is trying to help. If you put your teammates down, the team will fail. Use encouragement to get what you want. Say things that will help your teammates do their best.
Watch your partner’s back. Talk during the game. Warn your team of what the opponent is doing. Even when you are on the bench, you can help your team win by looking out for the players on the floor.
How to Communicate with Parents
Kids don’t know how to talk to adults. When they get old enough, they want to be more independent, and that is when the clashes with adults begin. Remember that the adults are in charge of everything that you need to be successful in basketball. You won’t be playing anywhere if you can’t conform to the adult way of doing things. That’s how you learn to be an adult.
The best advice I know: Learn to say, “OK”. Use this when your mom gets mad at you. Use it when your coach tells you what you are doing wrong on defense. To argue is pointless. In our example with Adam, if he had listened to his mom when she told to clean his room and said, “OK”, he would have been able to go to the game. Instead he argued. Kids always lose the arguments with adults by paying some penalty after the discussion. Don’t fight battles you can’t win. If you just say, “OK”, the adult has no further reason to continue. You have acknowledged that the message is received. There is no reason for punishment. If you need to make an important point, do it later when things are calmer and there is less risk. Say, “OK” and choose a wiser moment to disagree.
How Coaches Can Encourage Active Communication
First, coaches, don’t take offense if players appear to be ignoring you. Spell out your listening expectations early in the season. Insist on hustle to the huddle or they will amble away half of your time out and look bad in the process. Demand eye contact and nods. Leave the door open for questions. The coach speaking and heads nodding does not equate to effective listening. Good listeners ask for clarification if they do not understand.
Coaches may not foster listening. If the coach doesn’t listen, why should the players? If you’re too busy or too opinionated you’ll never find out what your team is thinking. When players are unusually quiet, gently ask them how things are going. If players initiate a conversation, listen to them. You want them to talk to you.